#AskAlyson: Buying In To Beauty Trends

Dear Alyson,

 

My daughter wants me to set up an appointment for her to get her eyebrows waxed. But, she is only 10 years old! I agree she does have bushier eyebrows, but what kind of message does this send about beauty? I am torn. I see how miserable it makes her feel, but I also want to teach her to be happy and proud in her own unique body!   

 

Sincerely,

Concerned Mom

 

Dear Concerned Mom,

 

I can see the conflict you are having. On the one hand, we want to teach our children to love themselves just as they are, and yet we also know how much they can struggle when they harbor concerns about their appearance – whether that is from acne, scars, disfiguration or other such things.

 

The fact that your daughter asked to have her eyebrows done, rather than you telling her she needs to fix them in order to meet societal norms, speaks volumes. I would never want a parent to suggest or impose specific ideas or notions of beauty on a child.

 

If her self-consciousness is hurting her ability to be social, or if she is being teased, you may want to consider a small non-drastic shaping that still reflects a youthful age. Thankfully, it’s just hair and not a permanent procedure.

 

Most importantly, continue to have discussions about body image and the power of marketing. And finally, be a good role model in this regard. Don’t comment on yours or others’ looks, but instead reflect on a person’s positive character. If you take this as an opportunity to show kindness and gentleness towards yourself and your appearance, she will follow suit, too!

 

Hope this helps,