Goleman’s Social Intelligence and Curling

(Originally posted March 4th, 2007)

I spent yesterday at a curling bonspiel,  a fund-raiser for the Brampton Library.  I had a great time for a great cause.  Curling is such a civil sport isn’t it? Unlike the bashing of hockey or the scowling of soccer, there are so many lovely protocols that support genuine sportsmanship.

Shaking hands before you begin, placing your opponents rock by the hack before you play, trusting each player to call when they have burnt their own rock while sweeping, everyone recognizes skill when a great  shot is placed.  Afterwards,  in addition to the perfunctory shaking of hands and saying “good game” – the winners buy the losing opponent a drink which you enjoy in each others company.  Its a lovely chance to visit and get to know folks you wouldn’t other wise have met.

Why do I mention this? Because I am also reading Daniel Goleman’s new book Social Intelligence.  His earlier book, Emotional Intelligence was also terrific, but this book seems to really be nailing so much of what Adlerian theory has been saying for 100 years.  Research has finally proven Adler’s premise that we are first and foremost “social creatures”.   Part of our current societal angst and individual loneliness, anxiety and depression may well be explained by the our increased isolation.  We are too busy working to curl, play, socialize, join clubs and teams.

Curling seems to be a dying sport sadly. I think it could be curative!

If you have not joined in some form of camaraderie this weekend – think about how you might add that to your life.   I swear it is tonic for the soul.